Relationships are up to...
Each one of us chooses how we build up or tear down relationships, including our own. Every relationship will have its own Mountains (peaks) and valleys (lows) which will relate to future choices and experiences.
Casual relationships can just happen and for the most part may diminish as fast as they form. True, authentic, loyal (real) relationships are built. Which is why a relationship is an investment.
Real Relationships that we hope will last need to be reciprocal to be at their best. Where two people mutually choose to share life together. A commitment to a relationship grows toward 100% (fully committed) over time.
Real relationships require a willingness to serve one another. That may not be a popular idea today. Serving others means that life and our relationships can’t always just be about us. Life needs to be about all of us collectively, no one person is any more important than another.
In any relationship individual expectations and needs should be discussed often. Expectations and needs continue to change throughout our lifetime. Having individual expectations and needs met on some level helps us to continue to feel connected. Our “met” relationship expectations and needs are also what make us “feel” happy.
Being transparent and vulnerable is difficult but also necessary in a committed relationship. Sometimes we will get hurt. People aren’t perfect.
What heals and restores relationships time and again is a willingness to ask for forgiveness and work toward change (better In the future) together. Reconciliation happens as attitudes and behaviors change permanently.
Settling for a status quo state in life is in some ways is the same as being ok with mediocre relationships. Partial commitment, deception, lies and manipulation are not relationship foundations that allow a relationship to last.
Building better relationships can start within our families. We can prioritize communicating and spending time with one another. In a family we full well know we are different, choosing to accept and learning to love differences can start at home. How we decide to accept and treat one another further strengthens or weakens a family unit.
Friendships are what help sustain our happiness on a regular if not daily basis. Communicating and getting together in person is how we “know” each another and share in the needs of one another.
Intimate personal friendships or relationships are often the people we take for granted the most. Prioritizing each other’s needs instead of expecting the people we say we love to serve or make us happy builds a relationship up.
Effort and energy are also a necessary part of any long lasting relationship. We can serve better, care more, and love sincerely not just when it’s convenient but for the lifetime of the relationship. If we all work to give a little, purposefully decide to do what we can, often, we can change relationships for the better long term.
Visit RealLifeRelationships.org to learn more about Loving Yourself, Loving Others, and Reconciling Through Love. Each individual self-guided course book can help you to take your relationships to a new level of understanding. The book Love Forever further discusses how we can choose to love first, now, always and forever. You can also like this page to receive our weekly blog on your feed.