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Facing the Mirror of Life

Bretta Durham

Looking for and assuming we will have perfect relationships is unrealistic. No one is perfect and we all make mistakes. Also, it is equally important to recognize that things in life do not and will not always happen exactly as we plan.

Relationships that are sustained long term despite trials and disappointments are ones we can learn from over time. Change in relationships can continue to occur as we remain faithful to those relationships.

Changes in life happen sometimes because of personal choices we make and other times as a result of circumstances not necessarily within our control.

Facing reality, seeing life as it is, can be difficult. Deciding to make the most of the life is a choice that keeps affecting our future. Past circumstances and incidences, not always within our control, are something we can work through and move forward from over time.

Getting back into the “game” of life by reengaging after setbacks and disappoints requires us to make personal decisions (what is in our control). These decisions need to be made sooner than later as the stress, from experiencing something negative, lingers.

The past can’t be changed. The future of any relationship and our individual lives can continue to change. Change can be seen as good as we choose to open our minds and heart to a new and different future not yet determined.

In order to make the most of life opportunities and our relationships we can continue to:

Consider what is best now. In other words we prioritize things in our life. What is important to us individually needs to remain a top priority.

Clarify will be best for us in the future. This sometimes means saying no to good things and saying yes to what is best. The clutter of the things we fill our life with needs to be removed from time to time so that we can get back to what we have decided is the important.

Accept limits but keep growing personally and relationally. Our future is not written in stone we continue to be the writer of what the next chapter of life will be. We will also never be all things to all people on any given day. We can keep making decisions that allow us to change our life and our relationships for the better one step at a time.

Learning to be content with the life we have been given may be the biggest challenge we continue to face throughout life but that is another topic for a different day.

The mirror of our life continues to reflect who we are and what our life is today. Moving toward living life to the fullest and loving others long term begins with each new day and decision we make for ourselves and for those whom we love.


If you are looking for additional information and support visit RealLifeRelationships.org to learn more about our self guided course books (Loving Yourself, Loving Others, and Reconciling Through Love) and the book Love Forever.



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