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  • Bretta Durham

Peace From Within

Relationships are important because we all need someone at different times throughout life. People who pour into our lives, and “live” life with us, may also help to bring us comfort in times of need.

Being at peace, with ourselves and in our relationships, can help us to further recognize the importance of finding peace again when life is challenging.

Learning the difference between loneliness and being alone by choice (solitude) may also help us to better understand how we seek peace and find inner strength.

Feelings of Loneliness

  • can be paralyzing as feeling lonely can cause us to think/believe that we don’t have the ability to be “ok” by ourselves

  • can further separate us from relationships and our life itself when we stop engaging.

  • can deceive us into believing that being by ourselves means we are truly alone (without friends, family, support)

Further isolation can lead to more feelings of aloneness. It is important to stay connected with people. Connecting and reconnecting with people we have relationships with can help bring us feelings of peace. As relationships (connections) can further help restore our feelings of support and a sense of belonging.

Solitude (Being alone by choice)

  • can help us to get rid of distractions that rob our time and energy (set boundaries)

  • can sometimes challenge us to face our stress and fears we have about the present and even the future (evaluate life)

  • can help us to shut out the “perceived” urgent and focus on the important. (refocus priorities)

  • can teach us over time that we are “ok” by ourselves (find inner peace)

Solitude (by choice) can sometimes also help us to better learn how peace develops from within. When we feel weak, we can look toward and seek to find an inner strength we never realized we had. In many ways, we are not always able to fully understand how strong we are until finding strength (from within) is the only option we have left. Other people and things are not always able to be part of our personal recovery (finding and living at peace) solutions.

Inner strength and peace continue to develop and redevelop as we face challenges and seek solutions. Sometimes we even just need to “breath” for a moment in order to “catch our breath” (find inner strength and peace) and get back into our relationships and life itself.

The holidays can sometimes lead to feelings of loneliness. Reaching out to see and spend time with friends, family, and even others in our community can help combat those feelings.

Learning to embrace solitude, by seeing it as an opportunity of “times of refreshing”, can help us to change our ideas about time we spend alone.

Learning how to “let not our hearts be troubled” can start with seeking to find peace again when life is challenging. We can choose to "let our hearts not to be troubled", as we better learn to rely on strength from within to help us as we keep living one day at a time.

Peace from within can also come from having faith that we can and will find peace again not necessarily in an instant but over a life time.

On a personal note:

This week many of us celebrate a man who came to bring peace. The peace we can have through him far exceeds the peace we will ever find from only seeking peace from within (by ourselves). His life, His gift, and His examples are something we can accept and better understand over a life time.

Relationships can, and often do, help provide emotional support on a personal level. The peace I find time and again from having a relationship with Jesus Christ, exceeds the help I have found from my relationships with people and things in this world. He definitely pours into my life, and lives life with me not just for a moment but for an eternity.

Visit to learn more about the self-guided course books we offer for individuals and couples and to find the book Love Forever. also written by Bretta Durham.


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